Shrine and Family Life

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Mother of Perpetual Help, 
we choose you as Queen of our homes.
We ask you to bless all our families
with your tender motherly love.[1]

It is always a wonderful sight when families pray the novena and attend the Eucharist together in the shrine.  After the novena and mass, some of them ask the blessing of the celebrant of the novena or mass. Others sit in the shrine benches outside or under the trees to have a picnic. Others go to the restaurants and eateries around the shrine for a family meal together.

A happy and healthy family life is one of the biggest aspiration for many devotees. Like Cynthia Jayson who wrote her experience in a thanksgiving letter on June 17, 2016:

One of the petitions that I have asked for a long time in the novena is to have my own family. I trusted you that this will be achieved despite my fear in child-bearing because of the disability which was the reason for my humped back when I was 11 years old. However, I was able to overcome my fear because of my deep faith in Jesus and you Mama Mary. This is the reason why it was only at the age of 38 that I was able to get married and had 2 children: A four year old boy and a two year old girl. Praise God! Praise to You Mama Mary! So I am happy to bring my whole family—my husband and two children—to your shrine and miraculous picture in wholehearted gratitude to you Our Mother of Perpetual Help.

family_shrine

For many devotees, their family is their greatest source of support. Family is not just the immediate family, but the extended family. Carmelita write about this in a thanksgiving letter on September 28, 2014:

Thank you with all my heart for my siblings, extended family, and friends who have helped me stay afloat financially, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. Thank you for my sister and brother-in-law who have welcomed me into their home so warmly and generously. I hope and pray that I may be able to give back something in return. Please, Mother, help me pray for their good health, safety, happiness, and long life. Help me, my Mother, so that I can be up on my feet and return their goodness and generosity.

At the same time, family life is one of the biggest trials and challenges of the devotees. Many families of devotees have experienced problems and crisis in relationships as Sylvia wrote in a thanksgiving letter in December 31, 2014:

Thank you very much for all the blessings that you have bestowed upon our whole family. Thank you God the Father for all the trials that we experienced as a whole family especially our marriage which I thought would collapse. From the bottom of my heart, thank you because you did not allow our marriage to break up. And because of the trials that we have experienced as a couple, we became stronger, our understanding for each other has deepened. Thank you that our family is still whole. It is indeed a big blessing that our family is still one until today.

Prayer for family occupies a significant part in the Novena. The novena has a PRAYER FOR THE HOME

Mother of Perpetual Help, * we choose you as Queen of our homes. * We ask you to bless all our families* with your tender motherly love. * May the Sacrament of Marriage * bind husbands and wives so closely together * that they will always be faithful to each other * and love one another as Christ loves His Church.

We ask you to bless all parents, * may they love and cherish the children * whom God has entrusted to them. * May they always give them the example * of a truly Christian life. * Help them to bring up their children * in the love and fear of God. * Bless all children * that they may love, * honor, and obey * their fathers and mothers. To your loving care * we especially entrust the youth of today

Give us all a sense of responsibility * that we may do our part * in making our home * a haven of peace * like your own home at Nazareth. * We take you as our model. * Help us to grow daily in genuine love of God and neighbor * so that justice and peace may happily reign * in the entire family of mankind. Amen.

The latest revision of the novena also added a prayer for the sanctity of life:

That we may defend the human dignity and sanctity of human life from conception to natural death,

Loving Mother pray for us.

Shrine Ministry

Many devotees bring the issues of their family into the shrine. At the beginning, the main channel for bringing these issues was the confession. As the shrine have daily confession, many devotees take the opportunity to celebrate the sacrament of reconciliation. But there are also times that the devotees share inside the confessional moral issues and problems in their family like marital infidelity, couple differences, parent-children gap, birth control, abortion, drug addiction, homosexuality, and many others. Because these are serious cases needing more time and attention beyond the confessional, we usually suggest counseling. From this experience, came the need for establishing a counseling center at the shrine. Thus, the St. Gerard Family Life Center was born.

st.gerard_family_life

The Center begun in 1991. It was named after the Redemptorist saint–St. Gerard Majella who is popularly known as “the saint of mothers.” Some people who have no children pray the novena to St. Gerard.  Many devotee couples who have not conceived for many years have testified that after they asked the intercession of St. Gerard they were blessed with the gift of a child.

The center has trained and professional volunteer counselors.  They give counseling on matters affecting the family, especially responsible parenthood and marital problems. They are available every day.

A sad thing that happens at the shrine are babies abandoned by their mothers and left in the shrine. The shrine takes temporary care of these babies and organize them for adoption through appropriate agencies. Many of the adoptions have turned out remarkably well.

A sadder case is fetuses of aborted babies, or miscarriage being left in the vicinity of the shrine. Because of the continuing number of these unfortunate incidents, the shrine has dedicated a special place in the ossuary at the back of the convent. Now the souls of these poor unborn babies shares the beautiful garden besides the ossuary with departed Redemptorist brothers and priests who have served in the shrine.

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Family Today

Keeping the family close together is one of the greatest challenges of the family in the 21st century. British sociologist Anthony Giddens observed that the family in the second half of the last century has become a major arena for the struggles between tradition and modernity.   The standard family of the first half of the last century—where both parents lived together with their children of the marriage, the mother was a full-time housewife and the father the breadwinner—is  now a minority.[2]

Individualization has transformed traditional marriage.  Marriage became the project of individual persons.  As German Sociologists couple Ulrich Beck and Elisabeth Beck-Gernsheim explains, “The why, what and how long of marriage are placed entirely in the hands and hearts of those joined in it. From now on there is just one maxim defining what marriage means: the script is the individualization of marriage.”[3]  The Becks adds that the couple has become the center of family: “Today the couple, married or unmarried, is at the core of what the family is.  The couple came to be at the centre of family life as the economic role of the family dwindled and love, or love plus sexual attraction, became the basis of forming marriage ties.”[4]

This is also the experience of many devotees’ family. Many of devotees’ families are undergoing transition. At the beginning of the novena until about the 70s, the typical family of the devotees is the traditional family where both parents lived together with their children of the marriage, the mother is a full-time housewife and the father is the breadwinner. Beginning in the 80s, the devotees family was strongly influenced by modernity. The modern family was characterized more by attitudes, values interests, and goals directed toward individual performance and achievement. In general, the family of the devotees today is in transition; it displays attributes of both traditional and modern family. In particular, the role of women is changing rapidly. More have joined the labor force. In growing numbers, they are escaping the drudgery of housekeeping.[5]

Pope John Paul II observed the same global changes in the family in 1981: “The family in the modern world, as much as and perhaps more than any other institution, has been beset by the many profound and rapid changes that have affected society and culture.”[6] The family “is the object of numerous forces that seek to destroy it or in some way to deform it.”[7] Twenty years later, the Pope would write about the family in the same vein: “ … this fundamental institution is experiencing a radical and widespread crisis.”[8]

When their family is confronted with great difficulties, devotees run to Our Mother of Perpetual Help. Our Mother of Perpetual Help is one of their greatest source of consolation in times of family troubles. Iris & John Monsalve and Family shares their experience in a thanksgiving letter in August 26, 2015,

In the previous years, during one of the most stressful times of our life as a family and as a married couple, we were aided at most times with your maternal love, provision and protection. It was during these times that we were caught in great financial distress due to an investment scam by people personally known to us. It was also the time that our second child was given to us after 5 years, but due to our ongoing circumstances during said period, ours was a difficult pregnancy. But great is your faithfulness and grace, heavenly interventions saw us through those difficult, stressful times. And we take this opportunity to thank you and let these be known to people of similar circumstances for hope and inspiration.

Contemplatio: Looking through the Icon

For years, through the icon, Mary saw and felt the struggles and suffering of the devotees in their family life. In the midst of the crisis and radical transformations that the family of devotees have undergone, the icon served as an anchor that gave them hope and strength. In the icon, they saw  Mary as a true mother who invited them to the right path–the path of her son Jesus.

The elements of the icon taught devotees how to live as a family of God. The icon is an image of the new family which Jesus proclaimed during his time on earth. The right hand of Mary points to Jesus as if saying: “Follow him: He is our Redeemer!” All throughout her life, Mary, Our Mother of Perpetual Help, gave everything for the mission of Jesus. In the same way, Mary invites all devotees to choose the way of Jesus in the midst of so many cares and enticements of this world. Mary inspires the devotees through the glory that God has given her, so that despite it is the narrow and unpopular road, devotees may choose the path of Jesus.

touching_icon

The left hand of Mary holds Jesus in a loving and caring way. The left hand of Mary symbolizes the throne of Jesus where Jesus sits. Mary is the seat of Wisdom who is Jesus. Jesus’ hands are turned downward, a symbol of His placing the graces of redemption in her hands.

Through the contemplation of the icon, Mary invited the devotees to strengthen their family life. The icon invited the devotees to contemplate the situation of their family in the light of the new belonging to the family of God. The family that they live in this world is their preparation to the new family of God which goes beyond blood, race, culture and even religion.

Missio: Following Jesus with Mary

The Holy Family is a model for all Christian families: Jesus of Nazareth, his mother, the Blessed Virgin Mary, and his foster father, Saint Joseph. The Holy Family was in many ways like any other family; they also faced many troubles and tribulations. Fr. Gabriel of St. Mary Magdalen enumerates the many difficulties of the holy family:

[The holy Family] … embrace all the tribulations of their never easy life: the discomforts of the sudden flight to Egypt, the uncertainty attendant on settling in a strange country, the fatigues of hard work, the privation of a life of poverty, and later the anguish of losing their Son on a pilgrimage to Jerusalem.[9]

Certainly, Jesus’ knowledge and wisdom was enhanced because of the formation and guidance Mary and Joseph inculcated in him during his early years. Thus, by the time Jesus was twelve years old, He was able to amaze the scholars in the temple with His wisdom and ability to discuss the Word of God (Luke 2:46–47).

Although, Mary was blessed by God to be the mother of his son Jesus, Mary did not understand everything.  An example of this was when the holy family went to Jerusalem for a festival when Jesus was twelve years old. After the festival, Mary and Joseph thought that Jesus was with them as they journey back home but Jesus got separated from his parents. After three days of anxious searching for him, Mary and Joseph found him in the temple engrossed in discussion with the scholars. Mary told him, “Child, why have you treated us like this? Look, your father and I have been searching for you in great anxiety” (Luke 2: 49). But Jesus told them, “Why were you searching for me? Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house? (Luke 2: 50)” Both Mary and Joseph did not understand everything that happened and what Jesus told them. They, however, continued to nurture Jesus with much love. Mary pondered deeply all these things in her heart. “Then He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was subject to them, but His mother kept all these things in her heart.” (Luke 2:51–52).

When Jesus began his ministry, he preach the good news of God’s kingdom. In God’s kingdom, Jesus will gather new family under God the Father which goes beyond blood, race, and culture. Mary has to give way to the new family that Jesus proclaimed and remained obedient and supportive of the mission of her son despite her lack of understanding. As Pope Benedict XVI states,

Then, when Jesus began his public ministry, [Mary] had to step aside, so that a new family could grow, the family which it was his mission to establish and which would be made up of those who heard his word and kept it (cf. Lk 11:27f).[10]

We find this in the gospel particularly in a scene in the gospel of Mark (Mark 3: 31 – 35). At a time when Jesus was persecuted and falsely accused, his mother and brothers were concerned about his welfare. So they went out to Jesus who was in the country preaching the gospel to the people. Surrounded by a crowd while Jesus was preaching, the word was passed on to Jesus: “Your mother and your brothers are outside asking for you.” Jesus’ response was “Who are my mother and my brothers?”

In a commentary on this gospel scene, prominent American scripture scholar Raymond Brown commented that Jesus’ response raises the issue of who really constitute his family now that the Kingdom of God is being proclaimed. As his natural family stands outside, Jesus looks at those inside and proclaims, “Here are my mother and my brothers. Whoever does the will of God is brother and sister and mother to me.”[11] Jesus’ response to the crowd is consistent with his other words to those wishing to follow him as he continues to proclaim the Kingdom of God:

Truly I tell you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields, for my sake and for the sake of the good news, who will not receive a hundredfold now in this age—houses, brothers and sisters, mothers and children, and fields, with persecutions—and in the age to come eternal life (Mark 10: 29 – 30).

This scene where Jesus praised a family of disciples that is obedient to God at the expense of his own natural family, may not incline readers to develop devotion to Mary as many non-Catholics do. Yet, in this scene Jesus subtly highlights the fact that Mary was the first one who obeyed the will of God. She is the model of being a member of the new family of God that Jesus preached. The belongingness to the new family of God is modeled after the fiat of Mary and her life of discipleship in Jesus.

This is what is happening in the shrine; the shrine is the gathering of the new family of God with Mary, Our Mother of Perpetual Help as their model. The thousands of devotees, coming from different families, gathered as one big family in the shrine to hear and live out the word of God.  They are the new family of God united in following Jesus, moved by the Spirit, journeying towards the Father despite differences in blood, culture, language, race, color, status and gender.

Call to Action

Devotion to Our Mother of Perpetual Help can be enriched by learning from the life of the first family–Mary, Joseph and Jesus. What are the challenges of this to our family?

family_novena

Our devotion to Our Mother of Perpetual Help can become more productive and meaningful if we begin to proclaim, live and practice our devotion within the family. Instead of praying the novena as individuals, for example, we can pray the novena in the shrine or in our home as a family. We can consecrate the family to Our Mother of Perpetual Help. We have a prayer for consecration to Our Mother of Perpetual Help in the novena:

Immaculate Virgin Mary, * Mother of God and Mother of the Church, * you are also our Mother ever ready to help us. * With hearts full of love for you * we consecrate ourselves to your Immaculate Heart * so that we may be your devoted children. * Obtain for us true sorrow for sins * and fidelity to the promises of our Baptism.

We consecrate our minds and hearts to you * that we always do the Will of our heavenly Father. * We consecrate our lives to you * that we may love God better * and live not for ourselves * but for Christ, your Son * and that we may see Him * and serve Him in others.

By this humble act of consecration, * dear Mother of Perpetual Help, * we pledge to model our lives on you, * the perfect Christian, * so that, consecrated to you in life and in death * we may belong to your Divine Son for all eternity.

Amen.

family_novena2

The first family at Nazareth have shown us the higher mission of the family. Families are inherently missional—that is, they participate in God’s mission to transform the world. The family participates in God’s mission of building a new family based on living out the will and values of God’s kingdom not because of blood, race, ethnicity, culture or religion. Understanding families this way implies conversion, a change of thinking about the family. Rather than viewing families as a training ground for individual glorification, families are communities of formation for the Kingdom of God in service to the world.

Joey Echano

(This article is an excerpt from the book Mary of Baclaran: Our Mother of Perpetual Help and Mission Today by Joey Echano, soon to be published)


 

[1] Prayer for the Home, Novena to Our Mother of Perpetual Help, Baclaran, 2016.

[2] Giddens, Runaway World, 59.

[3] Beck and Beck-Gernsheim, Individualization, 11.

[4] Beck and Beck-Gernsheim, Individualization, 11.

[5] Lucila Salcedo, et.al., Social Issues (Manila: Katha Pub., 1999), 60.

[6] Familiaris Consortio, #1.

[7] Familiaris Consortio, #3.

[8] Novo Millennio Ineunte, January 6, 2001, no. 47

[9] Fr. Gabriel of St. Mary Magdalen, Divine Intimacy, Vol. 1 (San Francisco: Ignatius Press, 1987), 96.

[10] Pope Benedict XVI, Spe Salvi, 2007, #50.

[11] Raymond E. Brown, J.A. Fitzmyer, and K.P. Donfried (eds), Mary in the New Testament (Mahwah, NJ: Paulist Press, 1978), 52 – 53.

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